Introversion vs. Shyness

Introversion vs. Shyness 

It is important to note that introversion does not necessarily equate with shyness. In their book, The Development of Shyness and Social Withdrawal, authors Schmidt and Buss write, "Sociability refers to the motive, strong or weak, of wanting to be with others, whereas shyness refers to behavior when with others, inhibited or uninhibited, as well as feelings of tension and discomfort."

Shyness indicates a fear of people or social situations. Introverts, on the other hand, simply do not like to spend lots of time interacting with other people. However, they do appreciate being around people to whom they are close. They find engaging in "small talk" tedious, but do enjoy having deep, meaningful conversations. Introverts also tend to think about things before talking. They want to have a full understanding of a concept before they voice an opinion or try to offer an explanation.

Misconceptions 

In an excellent article in Atlantic Monthly, author Jonathan Rauch took on some of the common myths and misconceptions about introverts. While introverts are often labeled as shy, aloof, and arrogant, Rauch explains that these perceptions result from the failure of extroverts to understand how introverts function.

"Extroverts have little or no grasp of introversion," Rauch suggests. "They assume that company, especially their own, is always welcome. They cannot imagine why someone would need to be alone; indeed, they often take umbrage at the suggestion. As often as I have tried to explain the matter to extroverts, I have never sensed that any of them really understood."

According to estimates, extroverts outnumber introverts by about three to one. Introverts often find that other people try to change them or even suggest that there is something "wrong" with them. Nothing could be further from the truth. While introverts make up a smaller portion of the population, there is no right or wrong personality type. Instead, both introverts and extroverts should strive to understand each other's differences and similarities.

A Word From Verywell

Remember, introversion is not an all-or-nothing characteristic. People can be what you might call introverts with a capital I (aka "very introverted") or they might be outgoing in some situations with some introverted tendencies. Introversion exists on a continuum with extroversion, and most people tend to lie somewhere between the two.

If you identify with some characteristics of introversion and some characteristics of extroversion, then there is a pretty good chance that you are one of the 70 percent of people who fall somewhere in the middle. Ambiverts tend to enjoy both spending time with others and spending time alone, depending upon the situation and their needs at the moment.

Most importantly, remember that one type isn't "better" than the other. Each tendency can have benefits and drawbacks depending on the situation. By better understanding your personality, however, you can learn how to play to your strengths.

If you are an introvert, find ways to cope if the stimulation from the outside world becomes too much. Seek out a quiet moment where you can get away from overwhelming noises and recharge.

In one study of adult introverts between the ages of 18 and 80, those who had strong social relationships and emotional regulation skills were found to be happier than those who did not have those skills. Make the most of your strengths by nurturing your close relationships in order to foster strong social connections and utilize your tendency to look inward in order to develop solid emotional understanding.

Introversion is perfectly normal. If you find, however, that your introverted tendencies are the result of anxiety that impacts your normal, day-to-day functioning, consult your physician or a mental health professional.

Introversion and Behavior

How does introversion impact behavior?

Researchers have found that people high in this trait tend to have a smaller group of friends. While extroverts generally have a wide circle of friends and acquaintances, introverts typically choose their friends much more carefully. Their closest relationships tend to be profound and significant. They also prefer to interact with people on a one-on-one basis rather than in a large group setting.

It is important to note that introversion does not necessarily equate with shyness. In their book, The Development of Shyness and Social Withdrawal, authors Schmidt and Buss write, "Sociability refers to the motive, strong or weak, of wanting to be with others, whereas shyness refers to behavior when with others, inhibited or uninhibited, as well as feelings of tension and discomfort." Shyness indicates a fear of people or social situations. Introverts, on the other hand, simply do not like to spend lots of time interacting with other people. However, they do appreciate being around people to whom they are close. They find engaging in "small talk" tedious, but do enjoy having deep, meaningful conversations.

Introverts tend to think about things before talking. They want to have a full understanding of a concept before they voice an opinion or try to offer an explanation.

While extroverts typically learn through trial and error, introverts learn best through observation.

In an excellent article in Atlantic Monthly, author Jonathan Rauch took on some of the common myths and misconceptions about introverts. While introverts are often labeled as shy, aloof, and arrogant, Rauch explains that these perceptions result from the failure of extroverts to understand how introverts function. "Extr[a]verts have little or no grasp of introversion," Rauch suggests. "They assume that company, especially their own, is always welcome. They cannot imagine why someone would need to be alone; indeed, they often take umbrage at the suggestion.

As often as I have tried to explain the matter to extr[a]verts, I have never sensed that any of them really understood."

According to estimates, extraverts outnumber introverts by about three to one. Introverts often find that other people try to change them or even suggest that there is something "wrong" with them. Nothing could be further from the truth. While introverts make up a smaller portion of the population, there is no right or wrong personality type. Instead, both introverts and extroverts should strive to understand each other's differences and similarities.

As you might imagine, jobs that require a great deal of social interaction usually hold little appeal to people high in introversion. On the other hand, careers that involve working independently are often a great choice for introverts. For example, an introvert might enjoy working as a writer, accountant, computer programmer, graphic designer, pharmacist or artist.

_References

_{Rauch, J. (2003). Caring for your introvert. Atlantic Monthly. Retrieved from http://www.theatlantic.com/magazine/archive/2003/03/caring-for-your-introvert/2696/#}

_{Sword, L. (2002). The Gifted Introvert. Retrieved from http://talentdevelop.com/articles/GiftIntrov.html}

Sources

Aron EN, Aron A. Sensory-processing sensitivity and its relation to introversion and emotionality. J Pers Soc Psychol. 1997;73(2):345-368.

Cabello R, Fernandez-Berrocal P. Under which conditions can introverts achieve happiness? Mediation and moderation effects of the quality of social relationships and emotion regulation ability on happiness. PeerJ. 2015;3:e1300. doi:10.7717/peerj.1300.

Cain, S. Quiet: The Power of Introverts in a World That Can't Stop Talking. New York: Crown Publishers; 2012.

How to deal: Introvert vs Extrovert children

How to deal: Introvert vs Extrovert children

William Doherty, Ph.D., a family therapist and professor of family social science at the University of Minnesota in Minneapolis, says that the pressure on parents to bring up a child right is both disturbing and unnerving. “The adult world has become so competitive and market-driven that we no longer buffer our children from those pressures,” he says on a leading children’s website. This pressure often results in parents forcing their child to be someone that he is not, leaving him confused and grappling to form his own identity.

What to do?

The trick, say experts, is to recognise the potential in each child and to work towards nurturing it, rather than trying to “correct” a flaw in the child, which did not exist in the first place. For Shilpi, what worked in her favour was that even though her two children were quite different from each other, they had their own set of likes and dislikes, which in no way reflected their personality type. “A lot of children think that an introvert child would keep to himself and an extrovert child would always be on the move; this is not true. While my son (who is an introvert) likes to play football, my daughter has recently started taking to colouring and it is the only time she sits still in the course of the day!, she says.

Here are a few expert-backed tips on how to deal with an introvert and extrovert child, to the best of your ability.

For an introvert child

•Encourage him/her to express himself, without worrying about the medium through which he/her does it.

•Do not force the child to “make friends” or be more sociable. As long as your child is engaged in something constructive, it is okay to wait it out till he is ready.

•Talk more with him/her: While it does not have to be a “conversation” loaded with big words (which might intimidate your child), simply being there for him will encourage him to be more reciprocal of other’s feelings.

For an extrovert child

•Build activities to keep him busy – get as much structure in his routine as possible.

•Hear him about – If he needs a channel of communication, let that be you and not anyone else.

•Help him understand that sometimes, it’s okay to let others speak or do things that does not involve him (your child).

However, each child is different and so is each parent, so while these tips might work for some, they might not work for others. Regardless of this, let your child be, and take pride in his personality, no matter how unique it is!

4 Red Flags When Dating An Introvert That May Be Hard To Pick Up On

4 Red Flags When Dating An Introvert That May Be Hard To Pick Up On

While some of us can't keep our mouths shut to save our lives and find nothing more delightful than being the center of attention, our quieter, more introverted counterparts often balk at the idea of having to be in the company of more than a few people at a time. While there is most definitely nothing wrong with dating someone who's more introverted, or vice versa, depending on what you're looking for in a relationship, it's a good idea to keep an eye out for red flags when dating an introvert that could spell trouble.

1. They May Be Hard To Read

One thing that can cause conflict between extroverts and introverts is that many people assume those who are more reserved are mean or disinterested (which obviously couldn't be further from the truth). But even though this is often not the case, it can be a source of drama.

"For instance, if your family thinks your introverted partner doesn’t like them because they never join family rituals or make conversation or extend themselves for family, this can create a relationship problem," says Masini.

2. You May Disagree On Your Ideas Of Fun

"The extrovert’s idea of fun — or even obligation when it comes to work, family and friends — is going to pose a real challenge for an introvert," says Masini, "Especially [for extreme introverts] who would rather not be involved in those activities because they involve so much being out there."

The truth is that, sometimes, regardless of how much you love someone, there is a fundamental compatibility issue. That is not to say that these can't be overcome, but it's going to require compromise on both sides that, for some people, could feel like they are just too big to make.

3. You May Feel Your Freedom Is Hindered

"When introversion creates stumbling blocks for going to parties, negotiating reservations at restaurants or hotels, or navigating a social life as part of a couple, then introversion is going to be challenge for any relationship," explains Masini.

While it should definitely be noted that not all introverts have social anxiety, there are some that do. If someone has social anxiety, it is their (and only their) choice as to whether or not they work to deal with this and at what pace they do so. And their partner should be understanding of this. For a partner who really thrives in larger social situations, this may present a challenge. But with conversation, understanding, and compromise, it's totally manageable.

4. It May Take A While To Become Aware Of Their True Feelings

In more extreme cases, where a person is so introverted that they are constantly struggling to assert and express themselves, even getting to the point where you are actually in a relationship with them and are aware of their feelings about you could end up being an uphill battle.

"If an introvert doesn’t ask you out because they’re too [consumed] by their introversion and risking rejection in what they may perceive as the spotlight, the relationship will stall," warns Masini.

Most people might not be extroverts or introverts but 'ambiverts' — here's what it means to be one

Most people might not be extroverts or introverts but 'ambiverts' — here's what it means to be one

Lets Confront -

As well as extroverts and introverts, there are "ambiverts" who lie somewhere in the middle.

Researchers predict about two thirds of us are ambiverts.

They are people who sometimes like to socialise but other times they want to be alone.

As with all personality types, there are benefits and drawbacks.

People often categorise themselves into one of two types: an extrovert or an introvert.

Stereotypically, extroverts are the life of the party, and like nothing more than socialising with friends and meeting new people. Introverts are happier going home alone and curling up with a book.

But as research has shown, extroversion and introversion lie on a spectrum. In fact, it might not be a case of being one or the other, but a mixture of both. These people are called "ambiverts," and one study predicts up to two thirds of us could be labeled as this instead.

For example, when I'm in the mood I can be the last person standing at a party. But there are also days I'd prefer to go home early and spend some time alone. People like me don't fit into the rigid categories of extrovert or introvert, because sometimes I'll be one, and the next day I'll be the other.

The study, published in the journal Psychological Science in 2013, highlighted some of the traits of ambiverts, by looking at how they sold products. The results showed that out of everyone, ambiverts made the best sales people.

According to the author Adam Grant, an organisational psychologist from the University of Pennsylvania, this could be because ambiverts are better at understanding other people's emotions. Rather than talking too much, or too little, ambiverts managed to do just the right amount — and make more sales as a result.

"Ambiverts achieve greater sales productivity than extroverts or introverts do," the study concludes. "Because they naturally engage in a flexible pattern of talking and listening, ambiverts are likely to express sufficient assertiveness and enthusiasm to persuade and close a sale but are more inclined to listen to customers' interests and less vulnerable to appearing too excited or overconfident."

As Grant told the Wall Street Journal: "Ambiverts are like Goldilocks — they offer neither too much nor too little."

However, they have drawbacks too. Ambiverts can find it difficult to know which side of their personality to lead in certain situations. While extroverts and introverts are fairly sure what they prefer, and what situations they thrive in, ambiverts may struggle to decide.

Because of this, they might find themselves demotivated but not understanding why. They might not realise they need to change their approach to a situation to feel more motivated.

The idea of an ambivert has been around for a while, since psychiatrist Carl Jung brought the concepts of extroversion and introversion into the mainstream in the 1920s. He theorised there was a middle group, but psychologists didn't start using the term ambivert until the 1940s.

If you want to find out if you're an ambivert, there's a test you can take developed by Daniel Pink, an author who writes about human behaviour. You can try it here.

What It’s Like to Be a Socially Awkward Adult

When you’re at a party, are you more comfortable talking to people… or hanging out with the family pet?

If you answered the latter, then chances are you're an introvert. Below illustration captures this nervousness and loathe of chit-chat in her series Socially Awkward Adult. The animated GIFs, still illustrations, and writing depicts her as an introverted character navigating the perils of get-togethers. From restless toe-tapping to staking out a spot on the wall, the subtle movements in her GIFs are expressions of the anxiety she feels inside.

“My friends find it hard to introduce me, since they know my standard courtesies would include just a string of awkward giggles. Believe me, I have tried! I’ve gone up to people with the intention of having a meaningful conversation, only to blurt out lines like, ‘hi-you-look-taller-on-Instagram.’”

Socially Awkward Adult is a work of satire, but if you're someone with the classic introvert character traits, you might be laughing as you shake your head in affirmation—that you, too, want nothing more than to curl up on the couch and watch Netflix (alone) on a Friday night. 

I arrive at any gathering with unparalleled optimism, which I gulp down with the first bottle of soda. It probably takes me ten more minutes before I can drag the definition of wallflower to a whole new level.

In a series of illustrations, animations, and writing, she describes the perils of party going.

When speaking out loud, finding the right word can be hard, because we tend to use long-term memory rather than short-term memory, writes Laney. It takes longer to retrieve words and information from long-term memory, so we often find ourselves speaking slowly or feeling tongue-tied. If you want to know what we really think, ask us to write about our thoughts (writing uses different pathways in the brain, which seem to flow fluently for introverts). Or tell us we don’t have to answer right away.

At any gathering, I easily can spot atleast five people who I know from Instagram. I know how they woke up, and what they ate for breakfast. I find myself awkwardly smiling at them. Now what? Do I go say hello? How does one not cross the fine line between being quirky and creepy? My heart rate could positively make an ECG go kaput.

Introversion is one of the major personality traits identified in many theories of personality. People who are introverted tend to be inward turning, or focused more on internal thoughts, feelings and moods rather than seeking out external stimulation. Introversion is generally viewed as existing as part of a continuum along with extroversion. Introversion indicates one end of the scale, while extroversion represents the other end.

The terms introversion and extroversion (also often spelled extraversion) were popularized through the work of Carl Jung and later became central parts of other prominent theories including the big 5 theory of personality. The introversion-extroversion dimension is also one of the four areas identified by the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI).

According to many theories of personality, everyone has some degree of both introversion and extroversion. However, people often tend to lean one way or the other.

Introverts tend to be more quiet, reserved, and introspective. Unlike extroverts who gain energy from social interaction, introverts have to expend energy in social situations.

After attending a party or spending time in a large group of people, introverts often feel a need to "recharge" by spending a period of time alone.

A nice stranger sometimes dares to make the first move, overlooking the obvious awkwardness written all over my face. My small talk contains a cross between squinting for answers and endless batting of eyelashes. Sorry, nice stranger.

If you have these same introvert character traits, you'll probably relate to her struggle. 

Causes

In order to know why some people are introverted and some people are extroverted, it is important to understand the role that your body's physiology plays. The way that your body responds to the outside environment plays a critical role in determining your level of extroversion and introversion.

On a physiological level, a network of neurons located in the brainstem known as the reticular activating system (RAS) is responsible for regulating arousal levels including wakefulness and transitions between sleeping and waking.

The RAS also plays a role in controlling how much information you take in while you are awake. When confronted by potential threats in the environment, the RAS will increase your arousal levels in order for you to be alert and ready to deal with the danger. Each person has a basic set point in terms of arousal level. Some people tend to naturally have a much higher set point, while others have a much lower set point.

They psychologist Hans Eysenck suggested that these arousal levels could be thought of as a continuum.

According to his arousal theory of extroversion:

• 15 percent of people have a minimal set point, meaning they naturally have low arousal levels
• 15 percent of people have a high set point, meaning they naturally tend to be more aroused
• 70 percent of people lie somewhere in the middle of the continuum

According to Eysenck's theory, introverts are those that have naturally high levels of arousal. Because introverts tend to experience chronically high arousal levels, they tend to seek activities and environments where they can escape from overstimulation. Because of their naturally high arousal levels, they are more alert and take in more information from the environment.

Escaping somewhere to have time alone to recharge gives them the opportunity to process and reflect on what they have learned.

When I get introduced to a stranger and the mutual friend gets distracted by a fresh round of incoming snacks, only to never come back. This is what my nightmares are made up. All I can do is to nervously tap my feet and wait for a messiah to sweep the stranger away.

Being Around Lots of People Drains Your Energy

Do you ever feel exhausted after spending time with a lot of people? After a day interacting with others, do you often need to retreat to a quiet place and have an extended amount of time all to yourself? One of the major characteristics of this personality type is that introverts have to expend energy in social situations, unlike extroverts who gain energy from such interactions.

That doesn't mean that all introverts avoid social events altogether.

Many introverts actually enjoy spending time around others, with one key caveat – introverts tend to prefer the company of close friends. While an extrovert might go to a party with the goal to meet new people, an introvert intends to spend quality time talking to good friends.

You Enjoy Solitude

As an introvert, your idea of a good time is a quiet afternoon to yourself to enjoy your hobbies and interests.

A few hours alone with a good book, a peaceful nature walk or your favorite television program are great ways to help you feel recharged and energized.

This does not mean that the average introvert wants to be alone all the time. Many introverts love spending time with friends and interacting with familiar people in social situations. They key thing to remember is that after a long day of social activity, an introvert will probably want to retreat to a quiet place to think, reflect, and recharge.

If having a few hours to be alone sounds like your idea of a good time, you just might be an introvert.

The combination of being introverted and having strong opinions can be detrimental to your own well-being. More often than not, I end up striking all great arguments in my head. Obviously, fearing what finally comes out of my mouth will be gibberish. Sigh!

You Have a Small Group of Close Friends

One common misconception about introverts is that they don't like people. While introverts typically do not enjoy a great deal of socializing, they do enjoy having a small group of friends to whom they are particularly close. Instead of having a large social circle of people they know only on a superficial level, introverts prefer to stick to deep, long-lasting relationships marked by a great deal of closeness and intimacy.

Researchers have found that people high in this trait tend to have a smaller group of friends. While extroverts generally have a wide circle of friends and acquaintances, introverts typically choose their friends much more carefully. Their closest relationships tend to be profound and significant. They also prefer to interact with people on a one-on-one basis rather than in a large group setting.

If your social circle tends to be small but very close, there's a pretty good chance you are an introvert.

People Often Describe You as Quiet and May Find It Difficult to Get to Know You

Introverts are often described as quiet, reserved, mellow and are sometimes mistaken for being shy.

While some introverts certainly are shy, people certainly should not mistake an introvert's reserve for timidity. In many cases, people with this personality type simply prefer to choose their words carefully and not waste time or energy on needless chit-chat.

If you are the quiet type and a bit reserved, you probably are an introvert.

After a few exasperating hours of exchanging awkward glances with strangers, I curl up in a corner at last. Failing at not having attempted half decent conversation with anyone, I end up watching the same people on social media.

Too Much Stimulation Leaves You Feeling Distracted and Unfocused

When introverts have to spend time in activities or environments that are very hectic, they can end up feeling unfocused and overwhelmed. Extroverts, on the other hand, tend to thrive in situations where there is a lot of activity and few chances of becoming bored.

According to at least one study, researchers have found that introverts tend to be more easily distracted than extroverts, which is part of the reason why introverts tend to prefer a quieter, less harried setting.

If you tend to feel overwhelmed in busy social situations, you probably tend to be an introvert.

You Are Very Self-Aware

Because introverts tend to be inward-turning, they also spend a great deal of time examining their own internal experiences. If you feel like you have a very good knowledge and insight into yourself, your motivations, and your feelings, you might be more of an introvert.

Introverts tend to enjoy simply thinking about and examining things in their own minds. Self-awareness and self-understanding is important to introverts, so they often devote a great deal of time to learning more about themselves. This might involve exploring hobbies they enjoy, thinking about their lives, and reading books that explore themes and topics that are important to them.

If you feel that you are self-aware and enjoy gaining deep knowledge about yourself, then you might be more of an introvert.

After a few exasperating hours of exchanging awkward glances with strangers, I curl up in a corner at last. Failing at not having attempted half decent conversation with anyone, I end up watching the same people on social media.

You Like to Learn By Watching

Where extroverts tend to prefer to jump right in and learn though hands-on experience, introverts typically prefer learning through observation. While extroverts typically learn through trial and error, introverts learn best by watching.

Introverts like to watch others perform a task, often repeatedly, until they feel that they can replicate the actions on their own. When introverts do learn from personal experience, they prefer to practice somewhere private where they can build their skills and abilities without having to perform for an audience.

If you like to learn more by watching rather than doing, there is a chance that you have a more introverted personality.

You Are Drawn to Jobs That Involve Independence

As you might imagine, jobs that require a great deal of social interaction usually hold little appeal to people high in introversion. On the other hand, careers that involve working independently are often a great choice for introverts. For example, an introvert might enjoy working as a writer, accountant, computer programmer, graphic designer, pharmacist, or artist.

Never forget the small joys of life...

Lessons Learned In Life...

As i mature i realize that i talk to myself more, i correct my own mistakes, i follow my own advice. Less people are around and that has allowed me to connect with myself. I've become one of my own best friend, i started competing with myself and simply trying to be better than the person i was yesterday.

Never Forget how far you've come. Everything you have gotten through. All the times you have pushed on even when you felt you couldn't. All the mornings you got out of bed no matter how hard it was. All the times you wanted to give up but you got through another day. Never forget how much strength you have learned and developed within yourself.

Everyday may not be good but there is something good in everyday. Sometimes we need to look from a different perspective towards life and the life makes you a different person.

It's a small try, may be it will change atleast one person :-

1. Thank God for another day and live like it's your birthday. 

There is no single way to be assertive. You don't have to blow people's doors off with uber-assertive comments like: "I don't buy that" or "That will never work"—especially if it doesn't feel comfortable for you. Instead, choose words and phrases that feel natural, or natural enough. For example, you might show assertiveness through careful, deliberate questioning—as in: "That's interesting—can you tell me more about why you believe that?" Or "That's an interesting point, but what I've seen in the industry is..." The point is that you can be assertive, but on your own terms and in a way that works for you. 

2. Just be yourself and be confident in showing your true self.

Finally, one of the very best ways to command respect is to be a problem solver. So, do your homework, and come prepared with solutions to vexing problems that the group is struggling with. And make these solutions evidence-based—grounded in research you've done or analyses you've conducted. People respect good ideas and smart solutions and this can be a great way to show assertiveness in a way that plays to your strengths as a smart, strategic thinker.  

In the end, remember that assertiveness isn't just for people who love the sound of their voice. You can be assertive—and make a real, concrete, memorable impact on a group—without being a loud-mouthed jerk in the process.  

3. Stressful days are a part of life, try to catch little joys and laugh..

You want to speak up, stand out, get your voice heard, make good points at meetings, and build a positive reputation as a worthwhile contributor—and maybe even someone with leadership potential.  But you're a bit introverted, and unsure how to be assertive and outspoken in a way that doesn't make you cringe.  

So, how can you be noticed and speak your mind, without compromising who you are? 

4. Don't believe everything people say. Life is just one big show after-all.

There was a time when running a private practice in many professional fields meant you needed a license, a private office, a desk, several comfortable chairs, a locked filing cabinet, and a sign out front. And for some practitioners that’s still the way to go. But for many, the private practice industry has really become the entrepreneurial industry with lots of fascinating ways to explore the limits of practicing your profession. (If you’re a licensed professional in any field, be sure to check the ethical/legal guidelines before moving too afar in the online/marketing world. There are likely to be limitations on your scope of practice, advertising ability, etc.)

5. Forgive others but don't be a fool to trust them again.

It’s so easy to read what others are doing and get caught up in a comparison trap. The pressure from online marketing sites is intense. According to the marketing wizards, for instance, if you want to be a successful author, it’s not enough to have Twitter or Facebook (or whatever) accounts—you also have to have lots of followers. And I mean LOTS of followers. As in five- to six-figures of followers. And an email list. Maybe this knowledge inspires you to get online: it makes me feel like giving up. It just seems too public; too intrusive, and more interactive than I care to be. 

6. Kindness is a language that a deaf can hear and a blind can see.

If you’re a reader or researcher, you likely have lots of potential topics to write about. And you may even enjoy writing—a great advantage for online marketing. Content is king, as they say. This might actually be fun. Also, marketing is not always about being noisy and prolific. I notice that because I don’t speak up a lot at meetings, when I do, people pay attention. I think the same principle can apply to marketing. You don’t have to blog or send an email every day or even every week.  You may not need to be as prolific as everyone says. We have all signed up to get a free pdf only to be inundated with daily emails from the vendor. And then we unsubscribe. Even great blogs with valuable info can lead to reader fatigue if they arrive too often. Know your market and what your clients/readers expect or want. You might be pressuring yourself to produce a lot of content unnecessarily. 

7. Never upset on missed opportunities, life always have its ways.

Even when we enjoy ourselves, socializing drains us, especially if it’s with large groups or people we don’t know well. If we suddenly become recluses and hardly talk to anyone for a few hours or days, please don’t take it personally. It’s not that we dislike you, it’s just that solitude is a must for us to maintain our energy and sanity.

8. Sometimes just sometimes when people say 'forever' they mean it.

How do I feel when I finish reading the articles, blog posts, and pdf’s; listening to the podcasts; and watching video tutorials on marketing? Tired. Those of you who have read my other posts know that I’m big on “energy” as an indicator. If I feel my energy going up, I know I’m on the right track.  Energy going down, back away. EXCEPT- that’s not always a valid measure when my energy is influenced by my introversion and/or anxiety. When I read a little, I gain energy and excitement. Too much? I start to feel overwhelmed and my energy drops. But this doesn’t mean I should quit the idea of marketing. It means it’s time to stop temporarily and sort out what I have just learned. Yes, those posts of “75 Things You Should Do to Market Yourself” are a little daunting. But you need to remember that you don’t have to do all 75 things. Instead, if the article is valid, you can go through the list and just select two or three items to try.

Life is short, break the rules, forgive quickly, kiss slowly, love truly, laugh uncontrollably and never regret about anything that makes you smile.