Life As An Introvert

Life As An Introvert

Let's face it – introverts get a bad rap. Society has made introverted people out to be backward, weird, reclusive individuals who do not have the ability to get out and function in real, day-to-day life. While in some extreme cases, those descriptions may hold true, the reality is that most introverts enjoy people (just in smaller doses), and actually do have the ability to function socially.

Introverts often have a different way of viewing life or dealing with it, but that does not mean that they are at all the people that society has portrayed them to be either. In order to do introverts justice, here are some things that are the true reality for introverts (based on my own introverted experiences);

1. Introverts are observers.

Introverts love observing people, interactions, beauty and everything around them. Through relationships, cultures, conversations, places, and the beauty they observe, they learn a great deal about life and what it means to live.

2. Introverts often think very deeply about life.

Because introverts are observers, they also think very deeply about life. Introverts analyze the situations they participate in and observe. They think deeply before making a decision. They are typically sensitive to the feelings and needs of others.

3. Introverts often worry a lot.

The idea of thinking deeply about things sometimes translates into worry for introverted individuals. Introverts worry about the people they care about. They worry about whether they are being annoying to others. They worry about offending people. They worry about being liked. They worry about the mistakes they have made. Because introverts tend to do a lot of deep thinking and keep a lot to themselves, really just about anything in life can end up being a cause for worry.

4. Just because they do not like loud, noisy parties, does not mean that introverts are anti-social.

I was literally told by a peer of mine that because I did not go to large, wild parties, I was not social. No, I am not social in that way, but if partying is the only way you define being social, then I think you have your priorities mixed up. Introverts actually often enjoy social events and activities, but rather than loud social events that involve numerous people and easily get out of hand, introverts typically enjoy quieter social events that involve a small group of closer friends. Big events with many unknown people can be overwhelming to the introverted personality, while smaller events with closer friends provide a much more comfortable and enjoyable setting to socialize and have fun.

5. Introverts often need time to mentally and physically recharge after a period of being social.

Doing life and interacting with other people is okay for a time, but it can be very exhausting for an introvert! Because of this, introverts often need a period of time to rest and stick to themselves after being social for an extended period of time. After mentally and physically recharging, they can be ready to go again for awhile.

6. Introverts enjoy quiet time by themselves.

Sometimes introverts need quiet to think, rest, work, do their hobbies, etc. Constant noise and engagement is part of what can be exhausting for them, so it is very common for introverts to need periods of time just for them. This does not mean that they are weird or reclusive. It simply means they need time away from others where they can truly be themselves.

7. Introverts dislike the stereotypes that surround their personality type.

These stereotypes are often unfair and completely misrepresent what introverts are like. Representations of introverts are inaccurate and unkind. Introverts are ordinary people with a unique personality. They have a different perspective on life, and that is okay.

How Introverts and Extroverts Act Differently in Meetings

he differences between introverts and extroverts can come into full light during a meeting. Extroverts are more likely to say what they think and talk through their thought processes, while introverts take in the information and sort through it in their own heads. The fact is that most meetings cater to extroverts, although this is rarely intentional. Left to run its natural course, a meeting will ultimately see more extroverts getting to contribute than introverts. The introverts in the room often go unnoticed; even if they have a game-changing idea, it never gets shared.

It doesn’t have to be this way, however. Sure, introverts could speak up more, but that’s not in their nature. Instead, meetings should cater to everyone who is attending them, not just the most outspoken. Looking at it this way, you’ll get better input overall from everyone in the meeting and each person will feel they get the recognition they deserve. In order to even the playing field, meeting managers first need to understand the different behaviors and needs of introverts and extroverts in meetings.

No one is an introvert or an extrovert all of the time. There might be people who are normally extroverted but become quiet in meetings, or who usually have an introverted personality but are outspoken in meetings (or just some meetings!). The following descriptions reflect the typical behavior of an introvert, or someone who behaves as an introvert in meetings.

Introverts don’t want to be in the spotlight. There may be the rare exception, but as a general rule, introverts don’t like being in the spotlight. They may hesitate to speak up because they aren’t comfortable being the center of attention (or they don’t want to steal the show from others).

Introverts may jot down notes as they mull things over. If you see an introvert taking notes during a meeting, it means they are prepping their own ideas. So if you catch them doing this, know that they are readying their opinions – it’s just a matter of getting them to share it.

Introverts will often speak up when prompted. While they might be quiet if left to their own devices, most introverts will share what’s on their mind if they’re asked to do so.

If you’re an introvert:

Write down your thoughts about the agenda items in advance. Give yourself a timeframe in the meeting to reflect; wait too long and the opportunity will pass by. You can get more time to think as you speak by first thoughtfully repeating out loud what you’ve heard.

If you’re working with an introvert:

Send agenda items well in advance so that your introvert can have time to consider their ideas. Consider doing a round-robin or a more structured meeting that ensures every person in the room gets a turn to speak.

In contrast with introverts, extroverts are usually the stars of the show. Instead of needing to be pushed, they sometimes might need reigning in. Here is what you can expect from an extrovert in a meeting:

Extroverts thrive in meetings and are energized by interaction. Few extroverts have trouble sharing their thoughts in a meeting – it’s just comes naturally. Extroverts can endure long meetings because they genuinely enjoy exchanging ideas with others.

Extroverts sometimes don’t think before they speak (or think while they are speaking). Not every idea that comes out of an extrovert’s mouth is fully formed. They will often do their thinking out loud, whereas introverts are more likely to think before they speak.

Extroverts may assume that others think like them. Since they’re used to speaking up for themselves, they may not consider that others aren’t as comfortable with it.

If you’re an extrovert:

You don’t have to completely change, but it can be helpful to the group for you to tweak your own behavior. If you find yourself talking a lot, reign it in. Be respectful of others’ time and right to speak. Take more time to think about what you say rather than speaking your raw thoughts aloud, and ask for the opinions of others (especially the quiet ones).

If you’re working with an extrovert:

Some extroverts may need help managing their own behavior. If they’re talking too long, find a tactful way to get them to wrap up and then ask others to speak. Having a facilitator in your meeting can help ensure that everyone gets a fair share of talking time. Don’t let any one person take over the meeting.

All meetings need balance to maintain productivity and keep participants happy. Differences between extroverted and introverted personalities can cause meetings to seem lopsided. By understanding the common behaviors of each personality type, meeting leaders can better manage their meetings to improve results and enhance feelings of respect and collaboration.

The 2 Types of People You Need on Your Team

The 2 Types of People You Need on Your Team

Charming, assertive, and persuasive, extroverts are heard loud and clear. While their energetic traits generally serve them well in the business world, the allure of extroverts can come at a cost.

That cost? Well, the introverts. It can be easy to overlook those who seem quieter at first glance and not realize how much value they actually bring to your team. But since your work will benefit most from collaboration and complementary skills, by only being attracted to those who are most outspoken, you may be missing out on an essential part of creating the most effective group.

Watch the quick video below to discover how a healthy mix of extroverts and introverts has produced some of the best partnerships in history—and how you can tap into the power of both personalities to make your team even more successful.

Get hold of the agenda a couple of days in advance and look deeper into any aspects that you feel need further research. Print and annotate the agenda with your thoughts to use as a cue in the meeting. Knowing the ins and outs of the subject in advance not only gives you a chance to respond on your own terms (as the meeting room can be a bit busy to think) but also to speak confidently in the awareness you’ve got the facts at your fingertips.

It needn’t be that way. Maybe you’ll never fall in love with the meeting process, but so long as meetings remain a part of office life you may as well learn how to get the most from them – even if your skill set is better matched to more intimate scenarios.

Ways Quiet People Can Make a Stronger Impression in Meetings.

7 Ways Quiet People Can Make a Stronger Impression in Meetings.

“Introverts are in their heads a lot, and they question their statements,” says Jennifer B. Kahnweiler, PhD , author of The Genius of Opposites: How Introverts and Extroverts Achieve Extraordinary Results Together . “Many times the talkers dominate the conversation, so introverts don’t find an opening to insert their ideas.”

What do you do if you find it hard to contribute at meetings? Dr. Kahnweiler shares her strategies.

Before the Meeting

1. Find Out the Meeting Agenda

Prior to any meeting, find out the topics to be covered so you can figure out what you’ll want to say about them, whether an idea, a comment, or a question. “One of the things introverts excel at is preparation,” Dr. Kahnweiler says.

2. Plan and Practice What You’re Going to Say

Quieter people may not be the best at thinking on their feet—quite the opposite, they often like to think (sometimes long and hard) before they speak. Practice in front of a mirror what you’re basically going to say, or imagine what you’re saying in your head to build your confidence. “By the time you get to your meeting, it’s like your brain is tricked into believing you’ve said it, so you’re comfortable,” explains Dr. Kahnweiler. Avoid memorizing, however, and instead go for a conversational tone: “You could even have notes, but just say it in your own words so it will sound more natural.”

3. Find Some Quiet Time Before the Meeting

Don’t rush into meetings last-minute, which could make you feel more stressed. Rather, give yourself some time alone before the meeting starts to help you feel more settled.

4. Put Yourself in a Calm State

Look for ways to lower your anxiety about speaking up. For instance, pay attention to your breathing and avoid negative self-thoughts before and during the meeting. “Focus on your breathing, slowly in and out,” advises Dr. Kahnweiler. “When you do that, it’s pretty impossible to be anxious, because you can’t be thinking about obsessive thoughts when you’re focused on your breath.” If negative thoughts are holding you back from contributing, figure out what irrational thought is getting in your way, such as everyone is more knowledgeable than me , and come up with an opposing argument, such as I’m very knowledgeable about this topic , so you can pump yourself up and realize you don’t have to get freaked out.

At the Meeting

5. Get it Over With Quickly

If there’s something you really want to say, make sure you do it early in the meeting—within the first five to 10 minutes. The longer you wait, the more of a deal it’ll become in your head.

6. Give Yourself Time to Think

If a colleague catches you off guard with a question, you don’t have to answer immediately. Saying phrases like “That’s a good question,” or throwing back an open-ended question to your colleague may give you extra moments to formulate a response. If you really are unsure of what to say, you could also say you need time to think it through.

7. Regain Control After Interruptions

If a colleague cuts you off while you’re stating an important point, regain focus and control of the conversation by putting a finger up to let your colleague know you weren’t finished talking. You could also say, “I’d like to continue my thought,” or the even gentler version (if the person interrupting you happens to be your boss), “I had a couple more thoughts to share with you on that.”

Although learning to contribute more at meetings may be difficult at first, remember that holding back at meetings may have ramifications for your career.

Dr. Kahnweiler says that “Meetings are places where people make judgments. You’re doing a disservice to people if you’re not giving them info about you and what your results are. You become invisible that way when people don’t really know you, and the organization is not really getting the value of your contributions.”

This article was originally published on Working Mother .

Powerful Exercises for the Introverted Perfectionist

3 Powerful Exercises for the Introverted Perfectionist

Are you both a perfectionist and an introvert? If so, you’re not alone—introversion and perfectionism often go hand in hand.

Why do these two traits often team up? It may be because introverts spend more time alone than extroverts, and in that alone time, introverts reflect on their reality and find ways that it is coming up short.

When introversion meets perfectionism, the pressure to be perfect is more keenly felt and can impact your self-worth. So, here are three powerful exercises that can help you reclaim your self-worth and expand your options:

1. Double Standards Definer

This exercise will help you pinpoint any expectations you have for yourself that are too high. First, think about the standards you’re holding yourself to in a particular area of your life. For example, what do you expect of yourself as a mother or an employee? Maybe you want to be the mom whose child never has a tantrum when it’s time to leave the playground or the sales person who is always the top performer. Write a list of these expectations.

Now, go through the list as though you were deciding what standards you would hold a dear friend to. Remember, this is a person you love and trust to act well. Which of these standards seem unreasonable? Cross out any that seem too high.

Then, ask yourself: What would be the implications if I applied these new edited standards to myself? Pick one tiny change that you can make in the direction of holding yourself to kinder, more forgiving standards and experiment with it.

Holding yourself to a kinder standard will take a lot of self-generated pressure off your shoulders. It opens the door to you exploring what it is you really want in your life (when you are not holding yourself to the standard of perfection). Allowing imperfection in your life also makes you a whole lot more relatable to other people, because you’re allowing your humanity.

2. Options Expander

Sometimes being a perfectionist and an introvert, you’ll feel as though you always have to provide the perfect conditions for the introverted part of you. For example, you might skip an event because you fear it will be too much of an energy drain. Or, you might give up a dream vacation because you know the journey will be exhausting and overwhelming. The downside is you may eventually feel like your options in life are very limited.

Try this exercise to help you think about expanding your options. First, write a description of the kind of conditions that the introverted part of you loves and enjoys. Use your five senses when you write this. In that special place, what do you see, hear, touch, taste, and smell? Cozy into the relaxing description that you have created.

Now, write a description of the kind of conditions that your introverted self is uncomfortable with. For example, you might find yourself sensitive to very noisy environments or avoid a retreat because at the beginning of the retreat you worry about introducing yourself to a large group. Again use sensory language as you write this. 

Next, write a list of adventures that you have always wanted to go on, both small and large adventures. You might want to go to a concert where you know the music will be loud and the crowd might feel overwhelming. You might want to visit Rome on a summer art tour but you’re worried about being in a group with others for extended periods.

Ask yourself: When going on my greatest adventures, will I always be able to create the optimal conditions that I described at the beginning of this exercise? Or will there be times when you have to make the compromise of experiencing less than perfect conditions?

Don’t just stop at brainstorming ideas for adventures. When you feel comfortable, actually choose one small adventure to go on. You can get the ball rolling by deciding on the smallest step toward making that adventure happen. It should be a step that is small enough to keep the introverted side of you feeling a degree of calm.

Remember that you can also create “pit stop” breaks for your introverted self. For example, if you do go on the tour in Rome, don’t go for the shared room option so that you get the time alone that you need to balance the time with the other tour members. 

By stepping into your desired adventures, while still acknowledging and allowing your introversion, you allow yourself to be you while you live a bigger life than you would otherwise have created—a life filled with memories of what you did, what you saw, and who you loved.

3. Positive Feedback Finder

Another self-esteem saboteur that can affect the perfectionist introvert is where you receive your feedback from. If you spend a lot of time alone and are a perfectionist, you will tend to rely on your own appraisal of how well you have done. For example, an introvert chef may never know how well he cooks, because he is so used to his cooking matching up to the recipe book pictures. He will never realize that for a lot of people this is not the reality of home cooking!

This is a common trap that perfectionist introverts find themselves in. Even if they do get feedback from others, they will sometimes be so caught up in their own thoughts and impressions of what has happened that they will discount that feedback.

To help identify some positive feedback, try the exercise I like to call “The Positive Feedback Finder.” First, get yourself a small journal and a pen that you like to write with. On the left side, make notes about your own positive feedback on how you have performed or acted. This will require you to notice what you’re thinking about. When do you notice that you did a job well, left a place better than you found it, or made a valuable contribution?

On the right side, begin to notice and record positive feedback from other people or sources. This could be something as simple as someone commenting that they like your new pair of shoes—or something more meaningful such as when someone says you’re a great listener or are perceptive (both wonderful traits that introverts often have).

You might notice at first that the left side is filled more quickly. Ask yourself: What positive feedback have I been ignoring, or is it simply that I have not found sources of positive feedback? It’s a wonderful gift to have sources of positive feedback in your life. Consider where you can find such people and seek them out. For some people this might mean working with a coach who can reflect back to you your positive momentum.

When looking at the left side, notice whether you are valuing or devaluing your own positive opinion of yourself. How would your life be different if you allowed yourself to believe in all that is good about you?

Often perfectionism is a part of who you are, just as your introversion is. Becoming aware of how your perfectionism and introversion are related can help them exist more in harmony. These parts of you don’t have to destroy your self-esteem or severely limit your options. Instead, when they are in harmony, you can become someone who is clear about what you want and is willing to do the work to achieve that—with grace rather than with punishment.

Here are some questions to consider to help you reach a state of harmony between your perfectionism and your introversion:

• How is my perfectionism trying to help me?
• How is my introversion trying to help me?
• How is my introversion a part of my perfectionism?
• How is my perfectionism part of my introversion?

These are not meant to be easy questions like those from a pop quiz in a magazine. They are deeply reflective questions. But, as an introverted perfectionist, deeply reflective questions are just your bag.

When you realize the value of your introversion and your perfectionism and see how they can work together, you can grow in self-worth and self-knowledge as you accept these parts of your personality. You can also notice how they influence your life, and so be more conscious about the choices you make and the adventures you choose to take.

This article was originally published on Introvert, Dear . 

Don't Change if You're Quiet, Embrace It

Don't Change if You're Quiet, Embrace It

Just because I’m more extroverted than introverted doesn’t mean I don’t appreciate my alone time. I don’t always want to engage in conversation, chime in on Slack , voice my opinion in meetings, or even weigh in on where our team should go to lunch next month.

Sometimes, I feel best when I withdraw, focus intently on my work, and use my voice sparingly. This has been especially true lately, given the intense political climate. I’ve certainly found some comfort in engaging with friends, family, and colleagues—both in person and online—but I’ve also found quite a bit of solace in claiming a quiet sanctuary and choosing to embrace my quieter side when smart, coherent words seem to fail me.

While you’ve no doubt read article after article about how (and why) to speak up first in meetings , how to get more comfortable in brainstorming sessions , how to respond when your boss puts you on the spot , rest assured that you, my friend, are totally, 100% fine if you haven’t got much to say.

This undersold fact is why I so appreciated a recent Introvert, Dear post by Allison P. who says just that in an article titled, “Being quiet is not a character flaw.”

You don’t need to make excuses or apologize for who you are.

One short sentence that serves as such a powerful reminder. The author talks about coming to this realization years and years after being told that she should be more outgoing, that she should speak up more. It may have taken her 20-odd years to accept her quiet nature as being an integral part of herself, but at least she figured it out.

If you’ve ever taken a personality test or if you vehemently identify as an introvert, hopefully you too know and love your chill demeanor. And if you’re an ambivert or like me—sometimes very vocal, other times quiet and withdrawn—then you know you have nothing to apologize for.

You’re no less intelligent, successful, or valued on the days you’re less up for carrying on a conversation, even if that’s most days. You are still an important contributor to your team and to your company and they’ve hopefully recognized that through your continued hard work and accomplishments.

“You do you” is still a popular mantra, and hopefully always will be. 

14 Ways To Gain Confidence When You’re At A New Job And An Introvert

14 Ways To Gain Confidence When You’re At A New Job And An Introvert

If you are an introvert, there are many aspects of life that can feel extra challenging — like gaining and communicating self-confidence at a new job. But, it doesn’t have to be.

It is completely possible for an introvert to be confident and build good positive relationships with people over time. Here’s how:

1. Know that you are wired to lead

Several years ago, TheLadders.com, conducted a survey and learned that 65% of 1,542 senior managers believed that introversion was an impediment to getting ahead in the workplace. The belief is that managers tend to see extroverted employees who tend to be more talkative, energetic and often popular as leadership material.

But, according to Professor Adam Grant from the University of Pennsylvania’s Wharton School of Business introverts can be better leaders. That’s because introverts are in tune with their likes and dislikes. They know what works best for them and they use this information to create work environments that optimize their effectiveness. Maximum effectiveness is key to career success. If you are an introvert – let that sink in. You are wired to lead. Own it!

2. Get charged before you engage

The main difference between introverts and extroverts is where they get their energy. Extroverts get their energy from engaging with other people – the more people they engage with the more charged up they get. On the other hand, introverts get their energy from being alone. Much like a cell phone battery, their energy gets depleted with extensive social interaction. Depending on their capacity, they will need to retreat from social interaction to recharge before they are comfortable enough to re-engage with other.

If you are an introvert, make sure that you find strategic times during your day to grab some alone time to re-charge. Consider scheduling an hour of alone time before large staff meetings or networking events. When you are charged and re-energized you more easily engage with others. This allows you to communicate confidence more easily with your new co-workers.

3. Leverage one-on-one interactions

Introverts are often more comfortable when they connect with others one-on-one. If you’re an introvert, use this to your advantage. Set up lunch dates with each of the members of your team and with colleagues from other departments. Use these opportunities to get to know them on a more personal basis as well as to ask for success tips for your new role. The bottom line is when you’re in one-on-one settings you’re more comfortable and this will go a long way in communicating confidence at your new job.

4. Dress for success

Do you know that awesome feeling you get when you have a new outfit that looks great on you? There’s nothing like it. There is no doubt that when we look and feel our best, we communicate confidence. So always strive to look your best. It will put a pep in your step that will radiate self-confidence at your new job.

5. Speak with a period at the end

In addition to your physical appearance, how you speak will make an impression at your new job. So, if you’re an introvert who wants to communicate confidence at work, use language that projects that you are a confident leader.

Also, be mindful that the volume and tone of your voice are instrumental in conveying confidence and leadership. Don’t sound tentative when you speak. Instead, speak with a period at the end. In other words, affirmatively and with authority. You should also limit your use of phrases like “I think” and “I feel.” If you’re in a meeting where others are dominating the discussion, don’t always wait for everyone to finish speaking before you chime in; you may never get the opportunity. Be ready to politely, but firmly Interject.

Your body language speaks loud and clear long before you open your mouth to say a word. The way you carry yourself sends strong messages about who you are and how you feel about yourself. Your presence and demeanor communicate your level of self-confidence.

So, watch your body language and adjust as needed in order to communicate self-confidence. You can start to communicate self-confidence by watching your posture: hold your chin up, shoulders back, feet 12 inches apart with your weight evenly distributed on both feet. If you do this regularly, you will begin to feel relaxed and comfortable in your own skin; owning who you are. As you communicate self-confidence with your body language, others at your new job will begin to view you as a leader.

7. Be engaging

Whether you’re at a meeting or at a social event your interactions with colleagues and key influencers will establish a foundation for your future success in your new role. Make it a point to be engaging and genuinely interested in the person you are talking to. You don’t need to be an extrovert to be engaging.  Dale Carnegie, a master at building relationships, said it best when he wrote the “6 ways to make people like you” in his book How to Win Friends and Influence People:

Become genuinely interested in other people

Smile

Remember that a person’s name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language

Be a good listener. Encourage others to talk about themselves

Talk in the terms of the other person’s interest

Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely

8. Speak up

As an introvert, you are likely not prone to speaking just for the sake of speaking. This is a good thing. But, you should be prepared to speak when it matters. As the new employee on the block, always prepare before meetings. Review the agenda and consider how you will substantively contribute to the discussion. Perhaps you will make recommendations to a project or ask questions that will clarify a point.

You may even affirm someone else’s point of view or offer a different viewpoint. Whatever your contribution is, be thoughtful about what you say and how you say it. In addition, understand that using too many words can kill the effectiveness of what you’re communicating. Use fewer words and get to the point. Remember, every word you speak will help to build your credibility before your new peers.

9. Talk about your accomplishments

Many introverts miss out on leadership opportunities because they are uncomfortable with self-promotion. They think that self-promotion is bragging. But self-promoting and bragging are two different things. Bragging is ego driven; self-promotion is accomplishment driven. Find and/or create opportunities where you can update key stakeholders about your contribution to successful projects at your new job. Those early wins feed your confidence for the next win.

For example, speak about your accomplishments during your performance evaluation with your manager or at a status update meeting. You may even find an opportunity to share in a memo that is widely distributed throughout your organization.

10. Public speaking

While it sounds counterintuitive, public speaking is an excellent way to build confidence when you are an introvert. Find opportunities at your new job to speak at meetings, workshops, seminars, and conferences. In addition to helping you build confidence, public speaking is an important leadership skill to develop. You can join a local Toastmasters International group or work with a coach who will be able to provide you with personal individualized attention.

New jobs come with new people, a new company culture and often new challenges. That’s why starting a new job can be emotionally draining for an introvert. This can ultimately impact your level of confidence. To counteract this, train yourself to see the glass as half full rather than half empty when you encounter challenges at your new job. When you find your thoughts going in a negative direction, challenge yourself to focus on the positive side of things.

Ask yourself questions like: What can I do to improve this situation? What lessons have I learned that will help me be successful in the future? How can this situation help me to help others? In addition to asking yourself these types of questions, take the time each day to write down the things you are thankful for. For example, you may be thankful for the sunset, the change in seasons, your talents, abilities, friends, etc. These exercises will help you to develop an attitude of gratitude and will lay the foundation for an uplifted spirit, a positive perspective and a higher level of confidence.

12. Develop a growth plan

In this day and age, it is increasingly more important that you be strategic about your leadership path. Therefore, the earlier you do this at your new job, the better. Developing a plan and a timeframe for where you want to go and how you plan to get there. Begin by doing research. Become a student of your industry and your new organization. Become familiar with trends and organizational changes.

Enlist the help and advice of mentors to help pave the way. This kind of research and planning will help you to make wiser decisions about leadership opportunities that may become available to you in the future. A growth plan will fuel you with a sense of purpose and confidence at your new job.

13. Volunteer for “stretch” assignments

As a new employee and an introvert, a great way to gain confidence at a new job is to volunteer for a stretch assignment. So, don’t wait to be selected for a special project; volunteer to participate in one. Speak to your manager about your goals and how you believe you can make a meaningful contribution. When an opportunity pops up that will highlight your skills and capabilities, volunteer for it.

But, don’t just volunteer for projects that will come naturally to you. Look for opportunities that will stretch you and help you learn new skills that will help you build your confidence. Be aware, nonetheless, that every new opportunity is accompanied by risk. But, it’s a risk worth taking if you are ready for the challenge.

14. Celebrate your victories

Every victory you have at your new job will empower you and make you more confident. Relish those moments and celebrate your victories.

This article originally appeared on Fairygodboss.

New Open Work-space Has Introvert Dying Inside

New Open Work-space Has Introvert Dying Inside

Q: After an office renovation, all the employees in my department were moved to a new workspace. Previously, we were spread across two floors, working in cubicles with tall sound-absorbing dividers. Now, however, we are crammed side-by-side into a small open area where everyone is constantly staring at everyone else.

As an introvert, I require a certain amount of quiet to concentrate, so this chaotic environment makes it impossible to think. Co-workers keep walking by, phones are constantly ringing, and people converse in loud voices. With all these distractions, there’s no way that I can do my best work.

I thought about using some plants for privacy, but we’ve been told not to put anything on our desks which might block our view of other employees. How can I survive in this place?

A: I believe open office designs are the work of the devil. Managers typically implement this configuration to save money on office fixtures or to promote “teamwork.” While the former motive may be valid, removing all privacy is hardly the best way to foster collaboration.

In reality, packing people together in an open space frequently has the opposite effect. Forced interaction increases irritation, distractions interfere with productive discussions, overstimulation creates stress, and many folks have difficulty concentrating.

But since your bosses have recently invested extensive time and effort in creating this bullpen, they aren’t likely to change their opinions soon. So for now, you might as well do your best to cope.

Try using earbuds to mask noise with soothing music. Eye contact encourages conversation, so stay focused on your work when people walk by. If someone initiates an unwelcome chat, politely explain that you have deadlines to meet.

Seek out quiet areas where you can go to collect your thoughts. If you need permission to leave your desk, explain how doing so will improve work results. Saying “I need privacy” sounds self-centered, but stating “This report will be done twice as fast if I can use the conference room” puts the emphasis on business issues.

Based on their prohibition of privacy devices, your managers are clearly enamored with the notion of constant interaction. But as the newness wears off, perhaps they will realize that continuous availability is not the same as teamwork.

To snitch or not to snitch

Q: After I joined this company two months ago, several people told me that one executive regularly smokes in the bathroom. I didn’t believe them until I actually saw him coming out of a smoke-filled stall. When I mentioned this to my boss, he suggested that I go to human resources. However, I’m not sure if that’s a good idea. What do you think?

A: Although this executive smoker is definitely in the wrong, you are wise to weigh the risk before deciding to turn him in. Approaching HR as a lone crusader is probably not the best move, because there’s no guarantee that your identity will remain confidential.

Instead, invite the colleagues who shared this information to join you in a group effort. If they appear reluctant, their longer experience with this company may have taught them that such interventions can be hazardous.

“Whether you win the championship or not, you’re going to be running around like crazy if you’re a member of Team Penske,” Newgarden said. “It’s just how Roger is. He wants to make sure we’re doing everything we can for our partners. And we’re contributing and we’re educated on all of the topics and business side of things. So you’re busy either way. Right now, you might as well just win, because you’re going to be busy driving for Roger.”

And for as much as Penske demands of Newgarden, the biggest burden might still come from this sport itself. That’s a challenge he’s rising to, race after race, event after event and interview after interview — even if he needs some time in that basement when it’s all said and done.

“I’m not being fake, but I just have to heighten myself. Energize myself,” he said. “After a weekend of doing that, I’m ready to just sit at home for a day and recover. … It drains me.”

Dakota Crawford writes for The Indianapolis Star, part of the USA TODAY Network.

What's Your Personality Type?

What's Your Personality Type?

If you don’t know whether you’re an introvert or an extrovert, you can figure it out very quickly, you only need to observe yourself a little bit . 

If you recharge your energy batteries, especially emotional and mental ones, by social interaction, you are probably an extrovert, and if you recover your energy while alone or in quiet surroundings, you’re probably an introverted type of person.

In other words, if you feel energized and refreshed after attending a party, while in a big group of people or by being very socially active (“absorbing the good vibes), you’re probably an extrovert, and if you feel recharged after being alone or in a very limited company with deep conversation, you’re probably an introvert.

Introversion means preferring the inner world, thinking about ideas and wanting to understand, while extraversion means preferring the outer world, including people, things and a desire for action.

An introverted person wants to understand, and an extroverted person wants to act. We can look for the cause for that on the biological level. Researchers found that introverts are highly sensitive to dopamine – the neurotransmitter that helps control pleasure and reward centers – and that the part of the brain called amygdala becomes very active with interaction (introverts have an extremely sensitive amygdala), thus introverts can feel overwhelmed very quickly.

On the other hand, extroverts have relatively low sensitivity to dopamine and therefore require large amount of outer stimulation. The reason for that is that stimuli travel a longer path through the brains of introverts. Understanding that can help you to realize that introversion is not simply a personality trait, but a nervous system setting.

Knowing that, let’s look at some of the most frequent nervous system settings of introverts. They:

• Focus on one’s inner psychic activity.
• Can’t socialize for large amounts of time. They have it, but it’s not long.
• Enjoy solitude, reading, researching, reflecting
• Need peace and quiet for good concentration.
• Work best when they’re alone.
• Prefer deep one-on-one conversations and don’t know how to do small talk.
• Are usually surrounded with close friends and family, and don’t like big groups of people.
• May seem quiet and aloof, sometimes have trouble communicating.
• Like to work on complex problems, paying attention to detail.
• Are easily distracted by the environment’s stimuli (need to make sure there are no distractions).
• Introverts are supposed to be more cat people, while extroverts dog people, but who knows.

As it will be explained later in the article, the facts stated above don’t mean that introverts can’t be social, good lecturers or performers, but definitely in a different way than extroverts. Usually the difference is that they need to recharge in solitude after being exposed to active happenings in their surroundings.

Based on Jonathan Cheek’s research, there are supposed to be four different types of introverts, each type having a slightly different flavor:

• Social: Preference to socialize with small groups instead of large ones.
• Thinking: Very introspective, thoughtful and self-reflective, without aversion to social events.
• Anxious: Not very confident in social skills, often thinking about what could go wrong.
• Reserved: Operating at a slower pace, thinking before acting, taking time to start with action.

The important thing is that one personality type is not cooler than the other type – be it extrovert, introvert or any of their sub types. You can find very successful and happy people on both sides, although some research suggests that extroverts are happier in general.  It doesn’t matter if you’re an introvert or an extrovert, the key is to understand yourself better and build your life on your strengths.

There are many successful introverts, including:

• Michel Jordan
• J.K. Rowling
• Bill Gates
• Abraham Lincoln
• Christina Aguilera
• Albert Einstein
• Warren Buffet
• Clint Eastwood
• Harrison Ford
• Barack Obama
• Marrisa Mayer
• Hillary Clinton
• Mark Zukerberg
• Elon Musk
• Mahatma Gandhi
• Larry Page
• Angelina Jolie
• Steven Spielberg
• Marilyn Monroe
• Jay Z
• Al Gore
• Leonardo DiCaprio
• Emma Watston
• even Lady Gaga

Nevertheless, when being an introvert or an extrovert hinders you, you have to go out of your comfort zone and push yourself to become better. It’s the same for both types. Much like introverts sometimes have problems with speaking up or socializing when really needed, extroverts often have problems with things like thinking before acting, focusing, not losing time on too much socializing etc.

The good news is that when you push yourself to overcome weaknesses of one type or the other at key moments in your life that need characteristics of the opposite side, you may slowly become the ambient type, possessing both introvert and extrovert personality traits; then you can experience the benefits of both types and make your experience and understanding of life much richer and deeper, probably also loving and getting along with more people.